Jesus, Peter, and the Three "Love" Questions
By Michael
A. H. Back
There are several words
in Greek for "love," and English translations rarely
distinguish between them. This is unfortunate, as the key to
understanding the interplay in this discussion is in noticing that
Jesus and Peter are not using the same word for love.
The Greek word
"agape" means "love in action - love that serves".
The Greek word "philia" means "affection, tenderness,
loving friendship, a feeling of love."
The first emphasizes
actions. Feelings may or may not be present. Agape is only agape if
it is EXPRESSED as an action. Simply put agape is when someone
ministers to the physical, spiritual, or emotional needs of another.
If it is not expressed as an action, it is not agape.
The second emphasizes the
deep feeling of love. It is the emotion we feel that we call
"love." Whether or not we express that love is irrelevant.
Philia is simply the feeling.
So this is how the
conversation is written in the scriptures
(direct Greek translation):
Then when they
breakfasted, Jesus says to Simon Peter, "Simon, Son of Jonah, do you AGAPE me
more than these?"
He says to Him,
"Yes, Lord; You know that I PHILIA you."
He says to him,
"Feed my lambs."
He says to him again,
a second time, "Simon, Son of Jonah,
do you AGAPE me?"
He says to Him,
"Yes, Lord; You know that I PHILIA you."
He says to him,
"Shepherd my sheep."
He says to him a third
time, "Simon, Son of Jonah, do you PHILIA me?"
Peter was grieved that
He said to him the third time, "Do you PHILIA
me?"
And he says to Him,
"Lord, you perceive all things; You know that I PHILIA you."
He says to him,
"Feed my little sheep."
John 21:15-17
In order to understand
what is going on here, you have to realize that Peter KNOWS he is NOT
using the same word that Jesus is. It is not an accident. He switches
to philia ON PURPOSE! Why?
Peter is
"one-upping" Jesus. Peter knows that Jesus is asking about love
expressed as an action,
but he also understands that agape does not
necessarily include any
FEELINGS of love.
What does Peter, a
passionate man of strong emotions, probably think of agape? To him,
agape is a cold, emotionless, INFERIOR expression of love. After all,
you could do "agape" to someone while hating that person in
your heart. What kind of wimpy love is that? To Peter, THAT is not
REAL love at all! HIS love is much SUPERIOR to agape, because he
FEELS it deep down in his very soul. To Peter,
what is real is what you
feel. To God, reality is what you do. Peter is saying, "I love
you so much, I don't have the words to express it!" And Jesus is
trying to say, "You don't express real love with words, you
express it with actions!"
Even after denying Jesus
three times just a few days before, Peter has
not learned that REAL
love, the kind that matters to God, is not what you feel, nor is it
what you say or claim to believe, it's what you DO! That is why Jesus
switches to Philia the third time; he is trying to drive home the
message that, "the ultimate measure of the reality of your love,
even your feelings, is in what you DO!"
Jesus is saying that
loving God is about doing to others, not about feeling
something for God. The
ultimate expression of our love for God is when we minister to
others. This is, in fact, a common message from Jesus.
This means that the
average guy who works 9 to 5, has a wife and three kids, and is
involved in his church ministering to others, IN ANY WAY, loves God
MORE than the monk who takes a vow of silence, and spends the last 40
years of his life locked away in a monastary praying and reading the Bible!
While it is absolutely
true that prayer and Bible study are vital ingredients in a mature
Christian's life, it is ministering to others that the Bible
identifies with loving God. It is AGAPE (ministering to others) that
the Bible says is the most important of all!
